bathing suit

I have been acutely aware that my family is happening all around me.  I could say I've been present to many dynamic moments lately. 

I set off yesterday to buy a bathing suit (more about that later) and I felt excited and nervous at the same time.  I used to swim in a swim club and thought nothing about getting a new suit other than that I loved it and thought I looked great in it.  This time around I am thinking "man, I've had three kids please nobody look at the back of my legs!" This thinking stayed with me until I viewed a film on a blog I follow.  It is called "Birth Markings", I would show it to you through utube but it is private so I will direct you to the blog (Starving Artist) I viewed it on. Just scroll up from the comments and behold the brave women who share their stories.  Birth Markings 

Since watching it I've been super conscious about how I talk to myself about my body.  Amazingly, the voice I use now is gentle and affirming!  I've also started noticing more "gentle" moments all around me.  The girls telling each other cute stories and hugging. 

We sat down to a delicious supper comprised of a waldorf salad put into wraps and I was excited and energetic, I was going to an aquafit class recommended to me by my friend Tara (thanks!) I felt confident and strong even though I was aware of the softer and larger parts of myself that I didn't feel I wanted to expose.  "Who cares" kept running throug my mind, I'm healthy, blessed to have such a warm and loving family and I get to go out with friends and work out!  Yippee!  I was grinning and laughing and couldn't wipe the smile off my face as I was driving home after, I had had so much fun. 

I've recently started drinking at least eight glasses of water each day (one of my goals) and I feel so much more energy, almost like a switch has been turned on and I feel myself thinking more clearly. My trick, I fill two canning jars with water and a little lemon and I drink them througout the day then it's so easy to see when I'm done.  I feel like some things are coming together.  The subconsious is truly amazing.  The bathing suit I chose is a two piece speedo and will come in next week, I can't wait to wear it!